OUR LIFE IN 3D

The Home of Daddy's Day Dare! ~ I am just trying to stay above water

Archive for the tag “beach”

25 Sep 2012
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Jamaica: FDR… License To Chill

Well, we made it back! The girls and I snuck off to the island of Jamaica for 7 days ~ barely. Thanks AMERICAN AIRLINES! That was sarcasm.

We found a nice all-inclusive in Runaway Bay, Jamaica called the FDR Resort. Parents, this is the place to be! When they say “all-inclusive” they take the term a little bit further and give you a real-life nanny every day from 9-5. They are the only resort in the Caribbean that does this and one of only 2 resorts in the world (I read) that gives you a nanny. These nannies come highly acclaimed (Trip Advisor) and become part of your family.

Also, you get a small kitchen in your suite and the nannies stock it for you! We had a sheet where you can request any of 6 soft drinks, beer, wine, a cheese and cracker tray, cereal, milk, fresh fruit and more. This was so cool I thought.

To get there, we had to be on a plane at 7:00am. So we had to be at the airport by 6 Saturday morning. We flew to Miami and the girls did great. We were supposed to head to Jamaica but had difficulty leaving the town through a myriad of difficulties with our airplane, at one time wondering if we were going to go at all. It truly was a comedy of errors, yet not funny at all, and surely not one of American Airlines best moments (more to come).

But we finally landed in Jamaica. Due in at noon, we landed around 4:45pm. A very timely shuttle took us to our destination. Once there, our mood quickly turned around as we found our reservation had been upgraded! I requested an OF 1 BR Suite and we ended up an OF 2 floor 2BR Suite. Our new vacation home had a nice big living room with pseudo-marble tile floors, mahogany and cherry wood furniture and fixtures, high ceilings (Ugh!), and more. What a great surprise and a nice ending to a long and difficult day!

A sunrise from our room.

I asked for a second floor room in our reservation so we could get an ocean view with no worries of the kids running away at Runaway Bay while we were in the shower. That part was nice. Now, with a two-floor suite with high ceilings, my calves were burning the first two days. Do you realize how many trips you make to a kid’s room? Now that room was upstairs. Those high ceilings made for some steep, steep stairs. I thought I was in shape but my calves were hurting. Be careful what you wish for, right?

We received our upgrade, in part, because I told them that Saturday was my anniversary (it actually was Friday) and also because the resort was fairly empty so they had rooms to spare.  Being the middle of September I imagine most of the resort’s target market had just taken their kids back to school this month. FDR had 8 buildings for guests but only the ocean front building was occupied. We had the place to our self!

So there we were! We made it to vacation, finally. Upon inspection of our new digs in Jamaica we found a chocolate cake and a bottle of champagne in the frig with our name on it too. THANKS FDR! To the resort’s credit, the whole staff did go out of their way for you, from the bartenders to lifeguards to maintenance to our great nanny, everyone went above and beyond with smiles on their faces. This was just the beginning we found out.

Nicely done FDR!

Further inspection of our upgrade revealed a nice, anniversary size king size bed upstairs. The bed may have been a bit old as it creaked quite a bit; maybe louder than any bed I had ever heard. But it was OK, we were on vacation. No problem mon!

The kids didn’t see ‘king size’ bed but a ‘jump castle’. And so, before we herded them off to bed our first night, we first had to shush them after jumping on OUR bed for 45-60 minutes. That next morning it became apparent how noisy that bed was as I got a high-five, two thumbs up, a wink and a nod from many of the guests down at breakfast. Not all of those gestures came from the men either. Those kids had made me ‘Legend’!

FDR was really built to cater to the kids too; young and old. Skylar enjoyed playing in the Kid’s Zone with our nanny the most. Both girls enjoyed feeding the rabbits and fish and doing crafts. They each made necklaces and tie-died Tee’s. The last day was goat races!

While both our girls like the water, Dylan is much more acclimated to it. She would follow mommy and daddy to the beach and pools in the morning. She made me ask the staff to turn on ‘Big Blue’, the 50 foot water slide, each morning so she could ride it. (Stay tuned) It seemed every day she either surprised or amazed us on her lack of fear and love for the water, including doing flips and floating in 40 foot ocean water. She also made a new friend, Lillya, from Switzerland. While they didn’t share much of the same language (Lillya did know a bit of English at 4 years old) they did communicate by sharing their love for the water, impressed with what the other could do. It was cute to see.

Lillya and Dylan jumping in together

Mom and Dad found a friend too in a secluded sanctuary at the edge of the resort, where we could hide from the rest of world, daring it to find us. We had a good breeze, great weather, and some crystal-clear tropical water to appreciate and cool off in.

A view from my lounge chair in our hidden sanctuary

The resort had an open-air gym that was actually above the poolside bar. There, the treadmills dreadmills had a beautiful view looking down at the neighboring beach, water and reefs. In fact, the water was so clear that, while running on this second-floor treadmill I could spot and follow fish swimming in the shallows at this beach in front of me. It may be the best view from a treadmill in its portion of the northern hemisphere!

Not your usual beach run

We did lots of research in shopping for and choosing this resort. Our other choices were a Disney Cruise, a fabulous Beaches Resort in Turks & Caicos, and our favorite Breezes resort in Curacao. We chose this resort, relying heavily on all the great comments by past vacationers on Trip Advisor.com. It seemed three out of four commentators on the resort, had been to the resort before and vowed to return again and again. in fact the reviews were so identical that the tourists seemed some sort of brainwashed. Everyone raved on the nannies and called them family. Everyone. They all sounded the same, brainwashed.

But Monday afternoon, 15 minutes into my specially beach-laden Ipod, the therapy started to work on me too. I have a special coastal Ipod I have taken to the Caribbean for the past few vacations. After listening to it for those prescribed 15 or 20 minutes, if you could wring me out, you would get drops of liquid sunshine, a salty coastal breeze, all wrapped up in a Tanqueray and Tonic flavor.

So, with my Ipod, sprawled out in my lounge chair, relaxing quietly in our own little sanctuary by the clear blue sea, sipping endlessly on my T&T,  the magic hit me too.

I’m coming back!

These nannies give parents a License To Chill; a rare, coveted document to new and old parents for ‘extended’ relaxation. Not just the 5 or 10 minutes we occasionally get.

Here’s a quick look at one day of our vacation:

We had few other fun things occur on our trip too but my wife made me do a ‘pinky-swear’ that I wouldn’t blog about them.

So take some picturesque Caribbean water, add shots of wonderful Jamaican weather and breezes with a splash of coastal melodies, finish with a scoop of ice and a well trained nanny, shake (not stirred) and you too can have a ‘License To Chill’.

If I haven’t bored you I would like to tell you a few more stories from our vacation over the next few days. Pack your bags and come a long with us!

Posted in Travel and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
14 Jul 2012
4 Comments

Memo: Summer vacation should never be dull!

So how is your summer so far? Have you been able to get out and enjoy some of the great activities outdoors? Our life in 3D has been fairly busy so far although “activities outdoors” turned out to be a bit of a curse. You’ll see what I mean later. When you live on the coast you get a lot of visitors in the summer. This year has been no exception. So I wanted to get you an update on where we have hiding the past month or so, sans WordPress.

Our girl’s summer vacation began with the end of school this year. Their Aunt Sue came down from PA for a week. Aunt Sue is one of the several friends that love to dote on our girls. If I was to guess I would bet she has half of their Christmas presents bought already and part of their birthday gifts. She doesn’t need a reason. If she see’s it, its on sale, and its cute, has something to do with Disney Princesses, cute clothes or shoes she will buy it for them. (Shhh… my wife and I hardly ever have to buy any clothes for our kids the way this works.)

Aunt Sue came down with a to-do list in hand. During the week the kids went to the park  or Chic-fil-a to play every day.

Hang on…. there’s more

Cinderella, you’re soo mav!

They played at home doing one of their favorite activities: Playing “dress-up”.

Knickitty knock-knock Tink!

They went to the nearby water park and then we all went to the beach on Saturday. We left in the morning to avoid the bridge traffic jams, bad leftover parking spots and prospecting for a spot on the beach.

Summer Saturdays in the surf and sand

The down side of going to the beach Saturday however is that it eclipses my gym day. So the first thing I did was try to sneak in a run back across that island bridge. Phew! Do you know how hot and humid it is running outside? That was sarcasm as I spend most of my running indoors on the dreadmill.

You can practically feel the humidity through this picture!

It was a great week and great weekend. Its always like a bit of a vacation for us when people come to visit as there is always plenty of attention to go around to the girls. They are at their best the whole time!

The next weekend the girl’s Aunt Charity came down with our girl’s favorite cousin Nikki. Nikki is two years older than Dylan and the two really hit it off. In fact that’s where she is at right now. Its great to see all three of them together! This time, however, we had to try to fit that ‘summer vacation week’ into a weekend.

Our ‘Heartbreaker’

So once again it was out to the beach. The kids love to play in the water (me included) and we had a great time. Then we hit a great beach restaurant on the way back before naps.

She Luvs the water!

Afterwards,  packed up the car again to go see a the Disney Movie “Brave”. To me, this was not the typical Disney movie. The young heroine actually rebels against her own mother. My wife points out this is nothing new for Disney if you think about the Little Mermaid. But it was a good movie.

I really enjoyed it and a must see for any mother / daughter duo out there. Plus it was set in Scotland with all those wonderful Scottish accents and scenery. (paralleling the movie Braveheart in a sense)

The next weekend was a break at our house. Our neighbors are a couple of loving grandparents. Accordingly they shipped 12 (yes, I said 12) of their closest grand kids in from all over to spend the summer here. They are all great kids. None are older than 10 and so they work out great with our two cherubs. Two or three of the oldest kids have really taken to our two. So I invited those three and my two to our downtown aquarium on Saturday.

We had the best time since I have taken our kids there. The popular favorite was the 12 foot albino alligator. We also saw a 10 foot Nile Croc curl up and scratch his ear like a dog. They are supposed to be sedentary aren’t they? Dylan petted a snake. Skylar grabbed said snake when it was here turn. I had a hard time pealing them away from the exhibit where you pet passing rays and horseshoe crabs.

“We got Fins to the left, fins to the right…”

They enjoyed seeing the jelly fish and sea turtles. Then they all caught their breath in front of the large tank. This time the 4 foot sharks kept making their passes right by our kids sitting on the floor. They swam up close enough to the glass where it was easy to spot their 3 rows of teeth. One time one swam up slow and close, appearing to almost stop right behind an oblivious Skylar, who had her back to the tank. The shark got everybody else’s attention!

The next week was the 4th of July week. Our old neighbors and best friends came back to town to visit and spend time with their family. We met up with them at the mid-week fireworks display. The kids had a great time playing with their oldest as us older kids just sat around and caught up.

The next morning it was back to the movies to watch a free airing for kids. We were lucky to see Dreamwork’s, “Puss In Boots”.  It was quite creative I thought as it wove a story line using practically every story book character around, from little Boo Peep, Jack and Jill (they weren’t so nice) Humpty Dumpty, Jack and the Bean stalk with the goose that laid the golden eggs and many more.

Salma, Antonio and Humpty-Dumpty disguised as the Golden Egg

It was a better than expected flick with Antonio Banderas and Salma Hayek in the lead roles. Hey, where Mathew McCoughney is to you girls Salma Hayek is to me.

Somewhere I picked up the most tenacious case of poison ivy that past week. I was wiping it with pure bleach. That didn’t even keep it down. It fell nicely into the weekend plans however.

Saturday and Sunday our friends stood us up found other people they needed to visit. We got it but it left our kids hurting as they were looking forward to doing fun times with them again. So how do you distract the broken hearted kids? Take them back to the beach! That was my idea. I remember from my youth how the healing powers of the sea ( they really are!) do great things to cases of poison ivy. That was my plan Saturday morning when I said “Let’s go”. I spent two solid hours playing in the salt water! The only effect the sea had on my poison this time was spread it around to my butt!

I was spreading getting the poison in all the worse places to get poison ivy. Think of the worst place to you? Yep, I got it there too. Sunday morning I got it on a place on my bum where I couldn’t see it. It just itched there! I had to stand up on a chair in front of the mirror in the bath to get a glimpse of how and where it spread. Now, imagine the feeling you might get as you innocently turn the corner in your bedroom early one morning and find your spouse standing up on a chair looking at their bum in the mirror? Its never dull around here!

Seizing the opportunity, I hopped off the chair and exclaimed, “Perfect timing!” (No doubt) I told my wife that I had a new batch of poison where I can’t see it and barely reach it. I asked her if she would do me the honors of dabbing the new batch of poison with a cotton ball filled with bleach. She fell to my logic and reluctantly agreed.

Now, going back to the idea of “never dull around here”. I bent over a bit, put my hands on my knees and prepared for the cold sting of the bleach ball. My wife started painting the affected area on my backside with the Clorax. All was quite until Dylan turns the corner and asks, “Whatcha doing mommy?”

“Well I, ahhh….you see., ahhh…because I, ahhh…. Dylan! Shouldn’t you be getting ready for church?

But the party doesn’t end there. You see, in our church they do a children’s sermon where they bring all the kids up in front of everyone and the Pastor tries to tell them a story or lesson. That Sunday’s theme was helping out other people. The Pastor asked if they helped out at home.

Help with the cleaning he asked? Help putting away their toys? He was leading up to when Jesus helped two people, ridding their illnesses, when entering a new town. And so he asked the kids if they ever need help at home when taking their medicine?

Dylan finally chimes in, “Well Pastor, I don’t so much, but this morning, my mommy…….”

Never a dull moment!

I hope the rest of your summer continues to get hotter and hotter…in the fun way, not literally. And that your summer may never rest on DULL.

PS: I went to the doctor that same Sunday afternoon and got a shot in my now infamous bum.You can’t have poison ivy when there are kids around, can you?

What fun things have you done this summer?

What has been one of your more embarrassing moments?

Posted in Archives and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
27 Apr 2012
6 Comments

WHAT WILL I DO FOR MY SUMMER VACATION?

You know….sometimes you go through those days when you are just attending to one fire, one responsibility, one obligation after another. Where you feel like you hardly have time to look up. The world is grey. No fun. The Blues! Mom’s been calling the bathroom her ‘happy place’ right now! Heck, the other day she called out four names until she got to the right one. And one of them was mine!

Then, some days, your mind gets to travel in those fun things to day dream about. The playgrounds of the adult mind so to speak, when you can escape the monthly Blues and plan some happy, fun things. Planning vacations may fall into this category. Or shopping for new houses. Planning birthday parties. Or fun things going on over the weekend?

This week has been in that happy ‘upswing’ for me because we are trying to plan our summer vacation right now. (sigh) And I need some suggestions. Wanna help? Care to take a trip down the pleasant memories of ‘vacations past’ with me?

You see, we have researched several fun resorts that are awesome for kids only to find our girls can’t go in the same ‘kids club’ with each other as one club is for ages 0 – 3 years old and the next if is for ages 3 – 6 years old. Naturally we want our kids to be happy and feel safe in a foreign land. We prefer that each is able to go to the same kids nursery if Mom & Dad want to sneak out and explore the island. Have any of you ever experienced this problem?

So far we have considered a Disney Cruise to explore the Caribbean, that looks great for the kids, but they are the source of various aged kids clubs. There are lots of fun things for the kids to do. Princess make overs! Disney characters throughout the ship. Great dining it appears, with your own personal servers for the trip. Evening movies on a large screen on the deck in front of the swimming pool and so on. But if we want to go for a swim with the fishes the kids might have to get separated. I picture having the off ship excursion all set up and we drop the kids off at the kids club and one throws herself on the floor crying and wailing. Can’t go then!

Get to play with the toys in Toy Story

We have found this wonderful resort, the St. James Club, on the island of Antigua. This all-inclusive sits in its own peninsula at the southern tip of the island, with water on two sides. It looks very nice. It has a great kids club and small water park. But the airlines make it difficult to get there, mainly leaving our air port at 6:15am and no quick layover anywhere. There’s nothing like passing 6+ hours in an airport with two hungry, tired toddlers! We’ve had that happen when we were ‘rained in’ last August in Philadelphia. It’s no vacation!

Very Tropical…once you get there

We found another resort on Jamaica where they give you a full-time nanny. Well, not really “give you”. We swore we would never go back to Jamaica again after our last trip and being badgered by the locals (Jamaica Mistaika!) This resort boasts itself as the best all-inclusive in the world on its web site. But you can’t even find what part of Jamaica its in unless you click on the ‘Brochure’ tab. ~ its not one of the best all-inclusive web sites in world!

Daddy, what’s the funny smell?

By far our favorite resort to pursue has been Beaches on Turks & Caicos. We’ve stayed with this chain before at a Sandals. The trip was exquisite! The resort and dining were extraordinary! This Beaches resort has the kids clubs, Sesame Street characters, a water park and all the great dining.

Elmo and the crew in the Caribbean

In fact, we had  reservations to vacation at this very Beaches resort 2 years ago! We made the reservations. Booked the flights. Then, 3 days later we got word we were going to be visited by the child bearing stork in a few months with a new born baby girl. We had to cancel.

Bye-bye paradise

That was one airline seat ago. Now, we actually have to pay for 4 chairs on the Caribbean flight, which makes this total package a bit pricey. For what that vacation would cost, flight and rooms, I could pay someone to rebuild our patio-deck-in-progress instead of me laboring over it myself. …..plus the patio furniture….a good sound system for out there…a wet bar fully stocked…well you get the picture. Sadly, this extravaganza is not in the budget this year.

We have considered going to Disney World, Universal Studios and all those other cool parks in Orlando but the idea of paying for a daily tickets yet being some place by 2:00pm so that one or more of our girls can bed down for a nap doesn’t make much sense either.

Last year we rented a house in Ocean City, New Jersey. This was a great kids resort, in a town designed for families. We had a great time. There is a boardwalk built for kids with rides, mini-golf, arcades, bikes and crapfully–unhealthy food to eat. What could be better to a kid? Or the kid inside all of us? Moms and Dads, even got to revisit a childhood memory with a boardwalk players production of Schoolhouse Rock. Are any of you old enough to remember Schoolhouse Rock?

We even frequented Browns Donuts, which was to be my business model for my get rich quick scheme during my unemployed days. Fresh, warm donuts. Mmmmm! The vacation could have been better if our youngest hadn’t picked up an ear infection two days into the escape. The one problem was that our kids were not big enough to get on the majority of the rides on the boardwalk; another problem I see with all the amusement parks in and around Orlando, FLA.

So help us out. Where have you been to? What great ideas or adventures have you gone on, been to, relaxed at with two small children? (a contradiction in terms?) I would love to hear your ideas! I could really use your good ideas here! Or maybe just come along with us if you want to be a nanny to two sweet kids for a week! Please hurry as yesterday Mom was actually sitting down watching Sponge Bob with the kids! And she was smiling!

“What are your kid vacation tips?”

“Which do you think we should choose?”

“Where have you gone to on vacations?”

Posted in Travel and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
15 Feb 2012
7 Comments

Jamaica Mistaica

So this lovers holiday had me reminiscing over past holiday trips, since we can’t actually go on one this year. Its been fun looking at pictures and reliving past experiences. It helps take the chill off! Thinking back, the trip that is the most memorable was the year we spent Valentines in Negril, Jamaica. So if you have a few minutes, can I tell you a funny story? Funny, now, that is.

First I have a few disclaimers! A) This vacation trip was a good five years ago. Any resemblances to this blogger in the pictures is merely coincidental. B) All the rumors you have ever heard about Jamaica are true….It is a beautiful tropical island, yes, there is a ganja drug problem there, and tourists do actually disappear there. C) There are many, many beautiful resorts there, most by the big chains from Breezes to Sandals and more. We unfortunately didn’t stay at one of them.

The view I had from my beach chair

Arrival: We flew into Montego Bay airport. Now for a third world air port Jamaica’s was pretty nice, with no hassles upon arrival, once they staffed the Passport arrival area. In fact, it may be one of my favorite air ports because it is small and there is a Jimmy Buffett Margaritaville right on premises. This is particularly cool for when you are waiting for your flight to arrive on the way home. Margaritaville has a great menu and a gift shop that is sure to leave you cashless, in case you had any funds left at the end of your vacation.

As with any trip when leaving the country, always do your research first! One very valuable tidbit we found was find yourself a taxi driver in Jamaica before you arrive. I can’t under estimate this enough, given what we heard about some. We actually found a few advertised on the Internet with references. Stepping out of the air port, on to the curb with your luggage, this piece of research paid off from the beginning.

The cab drivers were thick as thieves, trying to get you to ride in their cab. I immediately pulled out my sheet and asked for “Juan, our cab driver”. They all quieted down in an instant and one said he is over there. We went over to his cab stand, introduced ourselves, and boarded his cab. Once inside this rustic 4 door sedan, he turns around points to a small cooler on the back seat and asks, “ Would either of you care for a Red Stripe? I brought one for each of you.” Score one for Jamaica! (It took almost 7 hours to get a Guinness in Ireland) Double score, since my wife doesn’t drink beer!

It takes about a good two hours to travel to Negril from Montego Bay. So our cabby asked if we were hungry. We said yes. So before we left Montego Bay he pulls off to a quaint road side café; a locals only type of joint. He asked if we ever had Jerk Chicken before? We shook our heads no. So he said, “come on…”

We had our first taste of Jerk Chicken by some locals that knew how to prepare it. It was great! It was served on paper plates with a big helping of dirty rice. I stumbled upon another Red Stripe. So far so good. The rest of our trip to the resort was very bi-polar. Very beautiful scenery coupled with views of poverty ridden towns, that we have grown accustomed to seeing in the Caribbean. It always leaves you wondering what happens to all the tourist money, taxes and jobs that come into a tiny country like this.

The Resort: We arrived at our resort, Merrills III. It was only our third all-inclusive we had been to and easily the least glamorous. But it was what we could afford at the time, and given what we just drove though, very adequate. We unpacked, cased the joint for amenities and waited for dinner…..Jerk chicken and rice. :(

We ate. We explored. We went to bed. Hmmmm? I can see through the roof. The ceiling above us was very much a thatched roof. We could literally see some stars. Trying to be positive, we thought very appropriate for a beach side resort…as long as it doesn’t rain.

On the other hand, if the property directly beside you happens to be an outside, midnight beach bar, with absolutely no walls, right on the beach, catering to late night beachcombers because the volume is so loud it draws them in from two miles away, then we have a problem. (Sigh) And, yes we were in Jamaica. And, yes every song was reggae but there are some songs that should not be covered in a reggae motif. The Captain and Tennile’s “Muskrat Love” is one for instance. Even after days of hearing this it still made no sense. Live bands playing top 40 hits to a reggae beat just don’t sound good. Reggae songs sound good. The Bee-Gees do not. This bar started around 12 midnight. It was very loud, like our beds were stage front. And the party lasted until the sun came up. Pretty cool if you were 20 or so. I guess.

The beach and ocean was beautiful though. Our room opened up to the pool area (beside the beach bar!)on one side and above the kitchen on the other We had either Jerk Chicken or Jerk Pork everyday for lunch and dinner. And regardless of which entree we were having that night, the kitchen side always smelled like pot. When in Rome we thought!

Beach: The beach was nice; coarse white sand and clear blue Caribbean waters. Gorgeous! We were there to tan and snorkel and just relax and figured to spend most of our time there. Considering how much sleep we weren’t getting at night (from the outdoor bar silly person!) It was the place to be. Relax with a Red Stripe and soak up some vacation I thought. My foot had to be wrapped in tape every day from a running injury so the idea of walking far in the sand or shallow surf was really out of the question any way.

A wrapped foot kept me on the beach and out of the water

But what is with the armed guards on each side of the resort? The resort had rental police at each side of the beach along the property’s borders. We soon deduced it was from keeping unwanted locals off the property and harassing the guests. A few hours later we found out they were on the beach to keep unwanted locals from harassing the guest….on the beach.

You see the beach front was open to anybody walking by and the best way to describe the traffic along the beach was think about your last professional baseball game you went to. How many vendors marched by you there, selling a wide variety of goodies?

Negril’s beaches were very similar. You had all kinds of locals parading down the beach, trying to sell you their goodies. They tried to sell relaxing tourists everything from aloe plants, baby bananas, jewelry, bandanas, people-who-knew-people that sold the local crop, souvenirs, and even a Valentines Day dinner and snorkeling cruise aboard a sailboat. They all sounded just like those barkers at the ball parks. If you made eye contact they closed in. If you said no, they tried harder. If you got frustrated and asked them to leave, and they figured out you were an American, they called you a racist (we all must be racists in America evidently). This is when the policemen on the beach stepped in. Now this didn’t happen all the time but you did learn not to make eye contact. It is with this type of mentality, of a local beach peddler, that we were advised not walk very far on the beach at night. ..very unfortunate on a Valentine’s getaway!

Now the beach wasn’t all bad. We walked up to a locals craft market and found some nice things to bring home. We found another Margaritaville beach bar about a mile in the other direction down the beach. This was very nice; like a mini resort. We spent half of our souvenir money there it seems. It turns out half of Jimmy Buffett’s Margaritaville’s are located in Jamaica, which is another story (summed up in the video at the end). But if you are a fan, it was a pretty cool place to be on in barefoot, sun burned, half-naked on vacation.

I blew out my flip-flop

We met other nice people. Ate at some nice beach side bistros we found while beach combing (you can only eat Jerk Chicken so many times!). We were actually enjoying ourselves on the beach, as we should. Did I mention all-inclusive and Red Stripe? We actually had everything we wanted except…. snorkeling. So on Thursday, when the lady selling the Valentine’s Dinner Cruise and snorkel trip passed by we hopped at the chance.

St. Valentine’s Dinner Cruise: Our vacation getaway to some place warm had been OK so far. A little sleep deprived, but OK. But it was Valentine’s Day coming up and we hadn’t had a chance to swim with the fishes yet. We thought this was just what we needed to make our trip …memorable!

The plan was to sail on this large sail boat, sail down to a snorkeling spot, swim for a while, and then be served a dinner on the boat on the way back while the sun set. It sounded like fun!

We boarded the boat with the other 20 or so passengers. Everything was included , including a bar downstairs in the cabin. We proceeded to sail down to the snorkel spot. Then we heard a voice from the captain’s chair, “Oh no! Pirates!”

A chuckle in his voice kept me from terror. I turned around and here, speeding up to us, was a motorized canoe with two freaky dread lock males aboard. Now, I don’t know Jamaican pirates from Somalian but I didn’t like this. They came on board, went down below for a few minutes, then left the same way they arrived. We were spared!

It wasn’t long after I noticed, couple by couple going downstairs, two at a time, then coming back up. It wasn’t long after that we got wind of that familiar cash crop of Jamaica’s rising from the cabin below. Modern day pirates in deed! Watch out Tubbs and Crocket! I smiled to myself…no escape!

We reached our snorkel location. It was at the foot of what was called one of the 10 most famous bars in the world, Ricks!

See the local climbing the cliff to get back up to Ricks?

Here was a bar, on the west side of Negril, with perfect sunsets, where the apparent draw is cliff diving! Can you imagine?  Getting all Red Striped, feeling invincible (or invisible) and jumping two stories into the famed Caribbean Sea? With no apparent way to get back up to the bar…unless you can climb the cliff wall. Have you ever been THAT drunk? Not me. I’ve done some crazy things

Watch out below!

but …..

We grabbed our snorkel gear and hopped in the water. The water was nice and clear. Their were enough fish swimming to keep it from being a wasted dive. We explored the caves and tried to stay clear of the drop site from above. Not too bad really. We enjoyed it.

We finished and climbed back in the boat, toweled off and prepared for our Valentine’s Dinner Cruise dinner. You guessed it, Jerk Chicken and rice of course  :(

We ate our modest meal, happy to have finally been able to snorkel. We watched the coastline as we motored back home. Not a bad day all in all. Even met some pirates!

We soaked in the scenery along the coast. Oddly, I noticed we were slowly being left alone. Did I smell? Whassup? It seems everyone had migrated over to the ocean side of the boat. I stood up and looked over and then grabbed my wife by her hand. As we were cruising home without a doubt the most beautiful sun was slowly setting on the horizon. Nobody talked (they were all stoned…..just kidding). We just watched as something beautiful was happening before our eyes. Then someone pointed to a solitary sailboat was on a collision course with the sun on the horizon. The timing could not have been better scripted. As the sun slowly dipped halfway into the sea the silhouette of the sailboat cut across the orange ball, sailing directly in front of it before our eyes. It was like it was a scheduled perk of the V-Day cruise. It was a Valentine’s Day gift to us.

Our Valentine’s sunset. Can you see the sailboat approaching?

With apologies to myself, my family and all future readers, I was not going to spoil this moment by whipping out a camera. I decided to take a picture early, tuck the camera away, put my arm around my wife and just enjoy this moment unfolding at sea. The camera doesn’t come close to capturing the moment anyway. It was a special moment, at least to me and few future Valentine’s moments could ever stack up to it.

We got back to our beach, walked hand-in-hand back to our resort. Resolved to be forced fed yet another midnight version of Muskrat Love, and remember that day for a long time. Pirates for crissake!

Jamaica left us with some wonderful memories of a beautiful island yet inhabited by hundreds of panhandlers. We resolved never to go back because of that. Many of the locals were just too nasty if you ventured off the property. And we like to walk on the beach at night. There are too many other Caribbean islands out there, just as beautiful, we thought. And we resolved to explore every one of them for some more memories.

The sun setting on our Jamaican vacation

“What do you mean you lost the camera?!”

Jimmy Buffett’s Jamaica Mistaica:

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