January | 2012 | OUR LIFE IN 3D

Archive for the month “January, 2012”

07 Jan 2012

Let the mud slinging begin!

This weekend is shaping up to be another fun-filled blockbuster, since the holidays are over. Its the time of the year where all the waiting is over and we can find out who has the best stuff. When all the tailgating is over and its time to put up or shut up….Its time for Leaf Bowl 2012!

Yes our backyard is getting rather unsightly again, since it was neglected so much over the holidays. I would like to blame it on the weather but this year that excuse doesn’t fly. But this year was the year I was going to stop making excuses. I pledged to take ownership in my actions for good this year.

Always a helping hand

So, in getting back to our interview from Friday…. LeeAnne can you help me out? Please? Please? Please?

You see LeeAnne used to rake the leaves inbetween our houses when they started to pile up. She’d rake ’em, bag ’em and take ’em to the curb. She would even groom our driveway if it looked unsettling to her. Do we ever miss her! I just found a small toy of Skylar’s underneath the carpet of leaves on our driveway this week. LeeAnne, when ya coming back?

My begging almost has me feeling guilty when I think of some of the things that occurred when she wasn’t around. You know, boys will be boys! There are somethings you can only do when you ‘other wife’ isn’t around. And sometimes things can get a little out of hand when a wife is not around. You know what I mean!

Yesterday we left when I asked her about some encouragement about the prospects of me being a Dad. Today we pick up at the idea that maybe my being a Dad isn’t such a good idea:

7) When we first met our families became instant friends. Shortly there after we babysat Drayton, when he was about 3, while you and Troy went out for the night. I introduced Drayton to raspberries on his belly that night. He laughed and laughed. Later that night you came home and asked Drayton how everything went. He instantly jumps on his back on the sofa, pulls up his shirt and hollers “look what Andy can do for me!” (OMG!) Was there anything else you ever noticed that might have raised “concerns” about me being a Dad?

OMG this is so easy. Prepare yourself because the whole world is about to know that you thought a three year old could go into a bathroom by himself, get up on the toilet, poop, then wipe, get down, pull up his pants and come on out. How did that turn out Andy? J Let’s go back. You and Sabrina took Drayton to Chuck E. Cheese while I was at the hospital with my Dad. Drayton had to potty so you sent him in the bathroom. A few minutes go by and you come out the bathroom (according to Troy) with a look of panic on your face. Oh how I wish I could have seen it. Anyway, Troy goes in there and Drayton is covered in poop. He obviously couldn’t get up on the seat so just went potty right where he was standing and tried to “clean it up”. Luckily I never went anywhere without a few changes of clothes for him. That was another secret I let you in on. Always Always Always have extra clothes. You never know when your neighbor might take your child to the bathroom. Love ya Andy! I think Troy and I even said after that incident, “his poor kid”. Seven years later we are still laughing about that. It is a moment that we will never forget.

~ Its true. I was helpless. Poor Drayton made it to the “pulling his pants down” stage. And that is it. It was like a Big, daddy-size ball of chocolate sitting on the floor, covered in gravy from the back of his legs, through his underwear and all over the floor. I was NEVER going to have kids at that point!

Best buds from the beginning

8) You were around when we brought Dylan home and you were one of the first ones to meet Skylar when we brought her home. What do you think the biggest difference was between the two? Or us, one child to the next?

As for the girls, Dylan was so petite and had a little bit of hair. Skylar on the other hand was a round butterball with hair, hair, and more hair! She had more hair at one week old than I had when I was two! When Skylar came home you and Sabrina were definitely more prepared. You had been there and done that so I think it was a much easier transition the second time around. I wasn’t needed.

~ There were still so many times that we wanted to call! But thought we ought to figure things out for ourselves….and were embarrassed to ask for help….again.

"OUR" Motley Crew

9) Do you have any confessions to tell us?

Yes. When Dylan turned one you and Sabrina expressed that you did not want her to get in the bad habit of eating only chicken nuggets, fries, mac n cheese and typical kids snack stuff. You wanted her to eat healthy. Well I may not have listened as well as you thought. When I would keep her she may have went to McDonald’s on more than one occasion and had a happy meal. I will say the look on her face was pure enjoyment! Troy, Drayton and I would grin from ear to ear watching how much she enjoyed it. We had to give her a good lunch because we knew for dinner she would have to endure quiche, tomatoes or zucchini. I would always tell Drayton, “don’t tell Mr. Andy or Ms. Sabrina that Dylan had this”. I am so proud that he actually kept the secret.

So THAT’S why she always asks for the macaroni and cheese when we go out. You are are a wicked woman! 😛

FINAL THOUGHT:

I think that both of us have learned over the years that family is not defined by the blood in your veins but by love. Not only did you bring those two girls into your family but you brought in Troy, Drayton and I. The seven years that we spent as neighbors will forever be cherished. The memories of going to the beach, eating at Yokoso every year for my birthday, making smores when it actually got cold enough to make a fire, house projects that were worked on together, the list could go on and on. We love the four of you more than words can say. Miles may separate us now but we will always be as close as family can get.

Hey LeeAnne, we love and miss you guys too. It was like were losing part of our family. A divorce! How would we survive without our Go-To Girl? And Guy! And Dylan still asks if she can go next door and play with Drayton. She’s still in denial I guess. Hurry home! Lets hook up on the Messenger. And remember our conversations at the Boathouse! Kinda the carrot on the end of ths stick

Oh, and our 3 year old can go poppy by herself already ~ na-na-nanna! xoxo

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06 Jan 2012

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Tales about my other wife…

The past holidays brought us many, many gifts. Possibly none were as special as seeing my other wife again, and her family, as they visited over Christmas. We moved into our current house 10 years ago. We found the best neighbors in the world, Troy and LeeAnne, who quickly became our best friends. Simply, they might have been some of the best people in the world. We had similar interests. They had an adorable 3 year old, Drayton at the time. We did and shared all sorts of things together.

Why did I agree to take a picture so early in the morning?

LeeAnne was a stay at home Mom. When it was finally time to begin our family, she was our Go-To girl, based on the results of her son. We brought our first child home and LeeAnne was there to assist. I stayed home on my company’s FMLA plan and LeeAnne was my coach. I could not have got through those first 6 weeks without her! All the crying and screaming (sometimes it was the baby), feeding and changing, LeeAnne saved the day. She was the best ‘other wife I was allowed to have!

The best other wife we could ask for!

Six months ago Troy got the sad news he was getting deployed to some place far, far away (30 minutes north of St. Louis). It was devastating news to all of us. How would my wife and I survive without our Go-To girl? What kind of card had fate dealt us? We made some plans for the future and prepared to be separated, from our other wife, across the miles.

I talked to LeeAnne as she left on New Year’s Eve and she agreed to let me interview her. She can get a glimpse to the ‘other husband’ she has groomed me to be. Here is part of the interview from our World-Class Mom:

1) We call you ‘our other wife’ for all that you have done for us over the years, including raking our leaves, babysitting, dog sitting, cat sitting, house sitting, feeding our fish, cleaning for us, and training our nannies. I’m sure there is more, what did I leave out?

Think that covers it. I would like to take a moment to thank ‘Scoopy Doos’ or I probably would have taken that job on. By reading this out loud I was a really good “other wife”. Hee-Hee Maybe I should hire out.

Hire out? I have tried! Scoopy Doo’s was actually a lawn service of sorts that we hired. They cleaned up after our dog. You may have a glimpse ~~of what slackers~~ of how busy we were based on all she did for us.

2) When our first daughter was born YOU were the one who first taught me how to burp, hold, and change a baby. Then you taught me how to get a baby to stop crying by sitting her in a car seat and setting the car seat on top of the stove, under a running hood fan. It was like sitting beneath a jet It worked like a charm! What do you think was the best thing you taught me as far as how to deal with babies or a new born?

Introducing you to the product “Little Tummies”. I think you had a bottle of it in every room! It must have worked because she doesn’t have a gas problem now. LOL

~ If only my mom had some “Little Tummies” when I was a kid!

As they get older they will never be able to live this photo down!

3) You are my hero! I am having a hard time staying organized right now plus keeping the house clean, taking care of the kids and looking for a job. You had an immaculately clean home and yard, you exercised, ran, took care of us (!) and were a stay at home Mom with Drayton. How did you do it? What was your secret?

Structure. I plan my days out. After Drayton is off to school I will work out. If you don’t do it first it gets pushed aside and next thing you know you’re saying, “I don’t have time today”. Do it for yourself! I pick a day of the week that is my “big” cleaning day (mopping, dusting, bathrooms, etc) and then do tidying everyday to keep it up. You have to have an idea of what needs to be done and what you want to do or else it doesn’t get accomplished.

Warning, you have two little ones so as quick as you pick up a room they will have it looking like Hurricane Hugo just came through. ( I know!!!) Some days seem like a never ending battle. In my house it is not the kid but the husband that gets home and discombobulates everything!

4) Even though Drayton is 6 years older Dylan idolizes him in a sense. What is the craziest thing Dylan and Drayton have done that you have not told us?

You know all the dirt.

~Now that makes me worry, Hmmmm?

Settle down you two, settle down!

5) Dylan has proven to be amazing in many ways. What was the first memory illustrating that for you?

When she started to take on Drayton. He was rough and tough with her and she held her own. Troy and I still laugh when we talk about the times Dylan actually beat up Drayton and he would holler, “make her stop!” I knew then that she was going to be a strong person.

6) I had never held or changed a baby at all before our first born. You taught me! Did I ever give you any kind of sign that I could actually be a stay at home Dad?

The first time I walked in your house and saw you holding Dylan in one arm while preparing a bottle in the other. You looked so at ease (even though you probably felt like you were going to drop her) and while we were talking you heated the bottle, poured in the formula, then started feeding her. When she first came home you were so nervous but by the end of the first week you knew the basics and could handle her all day by yourself. I was a really proud “other wife” but kind of sad because I knew that I wouldn’t be needed much anymore.

~ I will conclude my chat with my other wife tomorrow. Check back Saturday for the rest of our reunion. I have to tell you though, tomorrow, it gets dirty! Shhh, we’ll need a mop to clean this mess up!

Have a great weekend!

Posted in Archives and tagged help, wife

05 Jan 2012

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Spending time with a Little Mermaid…

First, I want to ask for some help from all you bloggers. The Spam Man has found me. My Askimets picking up several every 30 minutes. It caught 42 from the time I went to bed until the time I woke up. It appears the spammer is hiding the spam mostly on image pages. Has anyone ever run into this? How might I find a ‘text box’ to only find the human ‘commenters’ from the computer ‘commenters’? Any and all help here is appreciated!

I didn’t want to detract from a very special day here in 3D as we have a special guest to talk with. Ariel, from the Little Mermaid has agreed to an interview today. Ariel has been the best friend of my 3 year old for over two years now. In fact, they go practically everywhere together, from running errands to going to bed.

Dylan is blessed to have Ariel’s posse, or tag-along friends too, Prince Eric and King Triton. Before they all became such good friends they were actually known as ‘Doll’, ‘Bunny’, and’ Bear’, favorites from back when they used to “hang at her crib”. I find the cast doesn’t always talk to me so I may have to use Dylan as middle ‘mer-person’. OK?

Meet, Eric, Ariel, and King Triton respectively

First I wanted to ask Ariel, do you like it better living on land or in the water?

“In the water”

Why do you prefer the water.?

“Because. No, wait…because Eric lives on a boat.”

Well if you live in the water Ariel, and Eric lives on a boat, how do you get to spend time together?

The Mer-Matchmaker

“They are getting married!”

I see. How do you feel about that Eric?

“It’s OK”.

Hmmm. Well Eric, what’s it like having a wife that lives in the water and you live on a ship? Doesn’t that make it hard on a marriage? Wouldn’t it be better if she lived with you on the ship?

“Oh, yes, yes, yes!”
King Triton, dad, do you enjoy having Ariel living in the water with you?

“Yes, I like Ariel the best!”

Aren’t you worried about something bad happening to Ariel, like Ursula taking Ariel again?

“No, because Ursula doesn’t like King Triton. And he dropped his sword in the ocean.”

That helps?

“It’s his ocean.”

Ariel, when was the last time you got a chance to see Sebastian?

“On TV!”

Can you tell me what is so special about being a mermaid?

“I get to swim in the sea with Eric and King Triton!”

So that ends our interview with our celebrity guest star. ~ they ALL just moved closer to the TV as Scooby Doo is coming on. Thanks for the interview everyone!

I am sorry it was not more interactive but it was still very early here and I don’t think the sugar has kicked in yet (in all of us). It is a brief look at mornings here in Daddy’s Day Dare. I am slowly tip-toeing further and further away from reality I am afraid!

If YOU would like to pose a question to one of our in-house celebrities please do and I will be happy to ask one of them. If you have a special character at your house maybe this would be a good way for them to ask Ariel a question too, being the Disney Princess that she is.

Ask as yourself, or for the cartoon character at your home. Just please be a real person and not a computer, trying to feed us some more spam! Or Peggy with Discover….

Ariel, how do you feel about spam?

“Oh I just give it to Eric.”

She’s learning, isn’t she?

Posted in Archives

04 Jan 2012

4 Comments

Wash away the old…..

Yesterday I was dressing Dylan. I found a warm shirt for her and then a matching pair of pants. She came back to me about an hour later. She stood in front of me sad because the pair of pants she was wearing did not go all the way down to her feet (they were too small).

And she says, “Daddy I think I am too small for these pants!” I knew what she meant. It was my mistake. I thought the pants might have been a pair of capris or something. Haven’t I told you I need help dressing these kids?

So Mommy gets home and she looks at Dylan and then looks at me and then looks back to Dylan and asks, “Dylan who dressed you today child?” Maybe I need to reevaluate my dressing standards? Wash away the old and open up to some new ones.

Speaking of, it is the beginning of the year again and I hear a lot about new resolutions or changes. It is that time of year. I am not averse to the resolutions. I think it’s a great idea! Only I have not been one for making resolutions for several years.

My history was the resolutions were a good idea in January but often forgotten by Valentines day. I never wrote them down or made a plan. I am a procrastinator after all! I do my best work under pressure. Well, that may be OK in school and maybe allowed sometimes at work but when it comes making changes in ones life, waiting until the last minute is NOT the way to go.

I once held a favorite quote at work….

“Goals are just wishes, unless we make a plan.”

There’s always a lot of people saying, “I wish I could stop smoking”. Or, “I want to lose weight.” Until you commit to it, and make a plan, it will be nothing better than a Christmas wish. If these same people are serious they would make a plan, write it down, and use it as a benchmark for their progress in attaining their goal.

A few weeks ago I read a great post by Leadership Freak, Dan Rockwell about building the future. I wish I had time to write all of it here. He starts off with:
“The past is the future for most of us. We cling to misguided notions that persistence, endurance, and more of the same will result in a new future. It won’t. “

The quote reminded me of the saying, “ If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you always got. So, wash away the old and start fresh in 2012 with some brash, concrete ideas, written down.

Dan suggests an idea for changes in his conclusion:

“Focus on your values. Creating a new future is disruptive and disorienting. Determine three or four guiding ideals. Without them, you’re adrift.”

Guiding ideals = benchmarks. I think you should write them down, so you don’t waiver from them and keep you focused on your initial goal.

One final thought that came to mind about turning resolutions into reality was an article I read back in college on management. It was from the Time Management author, Dr. Ken Blanchard, entitled, “Achievement Doesn’t Depend On Talent.”

He poses the question, “What does it take to be a high achiever?”

In his article Dr. Blanchard says, “high achievers are different; they have a plan. …If you have a goal, you’re bound to be heading upwards. Study after study, book after book, all say the same thing about high achievers. They have clear goals and are focused on what they want.”

So I want to conclude with Dr. Blanchard’s conclusion, “This is as good a time as any to set goals for yourself. Decide where you want to go and how you want to get their. Such a strategy will definitely improve your odds of success.”

So stick to those resolutions my friends! Write them down and make a plan. Its really nice being surrounded by all you successful people!

DO YOU HAVE A BIG GOAL FOR 2012?

Let us know in the comments. We are all here to help

I hafta go dress my little girls now. Hmmmm? Dylan just came over dressed as Tinker Bell!

Posted in Homework

03 Jan 2012

Tight-Wad Tuesdays – Go Team Go!

Yesterday our team did not make out so good. ..not so good at all. But that didn’t stop our girls from capturing a little bit of team spirit! ~ OK, they were highly encouraged by some of us here in the ‘spirit department’. They did their part to cheer our team!

Similar to the hopes of our team going unfulfilled are the chances the dreams for our daughters may not get fulfilled either. As much as we wish and plan, possibly these girls may not get Cheerleader scholarships to a good school! ~ It is such a cut throat activity some times.

So we have to be prepared to fulfill our scholastic dreams for these girls some other way.

Which brings as to today’s discussion. So far I have told you how to send your kids to college for FREE! I talked about the reasons to start investing in their college educations as early as possible, and why when the markets go bad it isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Next was a discussion for picking some truly noteworthy investments, proven over time to be winners, to help grow these kid’s educational funds to their full potential. But what if you get to this point and you have too many choices? Or hope to pick a winning fund over a sinking fund in the same asset class. What then? We want the best for our kids, right?

If you get to this point it is easy to over or under analyze. Analysis paralysis! Don’t get paralyzed by alternatives (my wife often says about me). Lets not make it too hard at this point. Here are two basic tips on mutual funds to help narrow in on the best of the best; or the best from the worst.

First, in picking a mutual fund in a certain asset category, go for the stars! Morningstar publications rate almost all mutual funds, giving them a 1 to 5 star ranking; just like restaurants. We eat in the best restaurants, right? You can usually find a Morningstar ranking by doing a search with the funds symbols or it should be included in your plan’s literature as well. So look for a mutual fund with the most stars! Ideally we want to pick a mutual fund with at least a 4 or a 5 star ranking.

Don’t get obsessed with the star ranking though. The ranking of the mutual fund actually tells us how well it accomplishes its goals, not the best in growth. For instance, a 5-star fund does exactly what it sets out to do. A 3-star fund doesn’t do it so much. That’s why we pick the studs with the most stars.

But that doesn’t mean a 5-star Bond fund will outperform a 3-star Large-cap Growth fund. It just means that bond fund does a better job at doing what it says it will do. Wouldn’t it be great if kids could earn stars this way?

So pick a fund with the most stars within your target asset class.

Second, what if you find 2 or 3 4-star funds in the same asset class in which to chose? What now? One easy statistic that ties indirectly to your funds growth is the fund’s fees. Fees are usually listed towards the bottom of the fund’s literature. Look for these. In general we want to pick a fund that carries the lowest fees. Never pick a fund with fees that are larger than 1% . Now that may seem like a small amount to spend, 1%, but remember that fee is coming off your earnings. So, if your fund grows 10% one year (that would be nice), after fees it only grew 9% at a 1% cost. On the other hand, if your fund LOST 3% one year, after fees taken out you have now lost 4%. Yikes! So pick the funds with the lowest fees.

One statistic associated with Fees or Cost is the ‘Turnover Ratio”. Turnover ratio has to do with how much trading the fund managers do in order to get you great returns. Just like if you did it yourself, the more the fund trades (buys and sells) the more commissions it has to pay and so the higher are over all costs that we just talked about. So a lower Turnover Ratio is a good key to identifying lower costs.

So, in summary, to make it easy in choosing Mutual Funds, find the 4 asset classes we talked about last week. Then find a great mutual fund in each one of those asset classes. To help us decide which funds are the best we want to pick the one with the most Stars and also one with the lowest costs (fees). Make sense?

Next week, I want to make all of you Millionaires, especially if you are under 30 and have some patience to invest. Its easy! ~ you’ll thank me later!

But for now I have to attend a party! Dylan has been putting together a tea party for Skylar all morning and I have to go. It gets really ugly if I show up late to these things!

PS: I have covered a lot over the last 4 weeks in TWT. If you have any questions at all on the topics or ideas I have discussed please email me via the gravatar and I would be glad to clarify things for you. Slainte!

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