OUR LIFE IN 3D

The Home of Daddy's Day Dare! ~ I am just trying to stay above water

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Sometimes kids just don’t understand…

Forgive me, this is yet another reblog from a Christmas long ago (5 years 12/19/2013). From back when I still was creative and these darn kids didn’t wear me out so much.  And since lots of things are going on right now, let me introduce you to 3D of Christmas’s past….

Merry Christmas week everyone!

Hello Life in 2D! Yes I said 2D today. I am just feeling uninspired this week. You know, with the Big Day coming up. Things to do. Do we have enough time? Wrap all the gifts. Other than trips to the doctor I’m just not feeling so inspired this week. Just kinda tired.

I do my best thinking in the shower.

Seriously!

The down side to ‘brainstorming’ in the shower is that there is nothing to write with.  So I have to hurry up before I run out of hot water.

So this is what I came up with…

My 3 year old still wants to know why Santa didn’t bring her presents last night, since we have all these decorations up?

I try to show her the Advent calendar but she still doesn’t understand. So it had me thinking about some of the other things our kids don’t quite grasp about Christmas.

Here is a Top Ten List of things our kids just don’t understand about Christmas:

1.    Some of Santa’s elves just wrap toys better than others. It has nothing to do with skill or the amount of time left to wrap them.
2.    The being “Naughty” or “Nice” list does not begin two weeks before Christmas. Santa and Santa’s elves actually DO watch them all year long.
3.    You can’t play with just one toy before opening every package that Santa and your grandparents bring.
4.    The elves designed some toy packages to ‘ship safely’ and not packaged  to immediately play with. Dad just needs some breakfast Christmas morning before he commits to untangling the maze of wires and twists or ‘assembly’ in order to get to the toy; or else it could get broken Christmas morning.
5.    If a toy breaks Christmas morning Santa can not bring you a new one over night. A whole new ‘Naughty or Nice’ list begins Christmas morning.
6.    Santa can make it down the chimney. Sometimes he just needs to make several trips. There is no need to leave the door open this year; or a window open over night.
7.    Santa’s presents really DO have something to do with somebody’s birthday. Just not their birthday.
8.    The toys are not more important than the thought or the love behind them; even the sweaters or the books you did not ask for.
9.    Santa only makes the toys. He does not bring the batteries too.
10.    Mommy and Daddy really do want to take a nap after opening all the gifts that morning.

Dylan, you can't stick the ornament on the tree by 'pressing' on the treeNo Dylan. You cannot make an ornament stick on the tree by pressing on the tree

What are some other things your kids do not understand about Christmas?

Please feel free to offer them below. Maybe one of us has an explanation. And there is no such thing as exaggerating too much.

Go ahead…embellish!

Merry Christmas!

Brrrr…..

So since it ’tis the season, and its snowing everywhere, I thought I would offer Snowball for all you kids and searchers.

snowball

One of our favorite books to read to the kids is Shel Silversteins’s “Where the Sidewalk Ends“. Every night at bedtime we take a few minutes and read some of our girl’s favorite pages to them.  Its fun. We act them out or exaggerate the stories, laugh and bond.

wherethesidewalkends

Why bring this up you may be wondering? Because my page, Bedtime Stories, at the top of this blog has been blowing up lately from searches of one of Shel’s fun poems and timely poems, Snowball, in the “…Sidewalk Ends” book. See it there on the Hit List on the right? Or maybe this post, Brrr is over there now as being popular? Cause it sure is Brrrrrr around here!

This has always been Dylan's favorite....

This has always been Dylan’s favorite…

If you like the poem a smidgen and curious about other Shel Silverstein poems you can check out a few on my Bedtime Stories page above. If you think your kids would enjoy  them, the book makes a great gift.

Readings Lucky for Me

Reading(s) Lucky For Me

Especially if you want them to like reading books and learn some things later in life.

Shell+Silverstein+Listen+to+the+Mustn'ts

Thank you Shel!

Have a great weekend!

shel signature

DYLANism: Those meddling kids!

First, I have to start off by saying that the girls go to the local library every week for story time. Then they come home with a handful of videos. Well for the last two weeks or so they have brought home a Scooby Doo video, full of small episodes from the Saturday morning fame. In fact, when she plays pretend now she sometimes asks me to call her Daphne and she calls me Fred. 

So this past Sunday we were going to get some ice cream. I ducked in my closet to get some shoes. Dylan, following me on my tail, sees a plum red (awful IMHO) cocktail dress of my wife’s. It was a Christmas present last year. Dylan looks at the dress and says, “Daddy, when’s Mommy ever gonna wear this dress?”

She’s into dresses now. 

I shrugged my shoulders with a chuckle, “I don’t know Dylan.” 

So Dylan chimes in, either getting, or not getting my smirk, “Halloween? She could wear it Trick or Treating.” 

I laughed to myself and said, “Maybe.” 

So I went out to get my keys. They were not at the usual spot. I asked, “Dylan, have you seen my car keys?” 

No Daddy” she responds. And so we went to look for them in my car. Dylan ran ahead. 

We got to my car, Dylan popped in the front seat and said, “I don’t see them Daddy.” 

I looked in the ignition switch and sure enough they were not there. I said, “OK Dylan lets go back inside. I have to see if I can find those keys if we’re going to go. I don’t know where they can be now.” 

Dylan hops out of the car, and looks at me, shrugging her shoulders and offers, “looks like we got ourselves another mystery on our hands!” 

Now if we could only find the keys to the Mystery Machine!  

Does that mean there’s no ice cream?

DYLANism: What’s that in your pocket?

This morning I woke up and got up for breakfast. I made it all the way to the shower before either of our kids woke up. Dylan usually wakes up before I do but she seems to be running a bit of a fever the past two days and so has slept a little bit later.

I got out of the shower, dried off, and started the rest of my routine. Dylan walked in our bathroom, all quiet, sleepy and passive, about the same time Mom rotated into the shower from her nightly slumber. Luckily,  I was able to get my underwear on before Dylan turned the corner.

Dylan stood there watching me brush my teeth in my underwear. When I was done she asked, “is that a pocket Daddy?” looking at the sewn fly in my boxers.

Now, I realize the bulk of my readers are female but I have to guess you know what athletic boxers look like, so I will spare you the description, and how the fly is sewn on to the front.  🙂 For those of you that can’t imagine, I would just like to leave you with the adjectives: snug, majestic, and Micheal Jordon.

OK, I would like to leave you with that description but it wouldn’t be entirely true. And I know Micheal Jordan isn’t exactly an adjective but Hanes is.

Dylan left the door hanging wide open for a witty reply however with the ‘pocket‘ question. But, as I looked over my shoulder to see Mommy looking at me in a somewhat unglamorous position, after staggering into  the shower room (she rarely opens her eyes when she makes this trip), I figured I better behave.

I replied, “why yes Dylan it is a pocket?”

“What’s it for Daddy?”

The one liners are just sitting on the tip of my tongue but rolling with it I told her, “Well I can put my keys in there. Or my wallet…..Or both.”

Dylan deduces, ” Isn’t it hard to find there Daddy?”  (thanks sport)

I agreed, “Well that’s the idea Dylan” as I looked over to Mommy for approval.

Mommy just shook her head and flushed her face into the palms of her hands in disbelief.

I don’t know what she was shaking her head about? I was proud of myself for keeping the conversation to a ‘G’ rating and yet still a wee bit amusing (pardon the pun)

So, to all you new parents out there, you have these conversations  to look forward too!

No, there’s no money in there…

The Alamo!

Ready for Christmas? Here is the daily Christmas mood music!  I stumbled across this lively Celtic carol, “A Soalin”. Fancy a more traditional carol? Click here to hear one you know by heart.                    

Last night after dinner mommy and I were discussing a meeting of mine  that had occurred earlier that day. The only thing that I could think of  during the meeting was The Alamo!. I was out manned, out gunned, out prepared! I was creamed!

Mommy sympathizing said, “well don’t worry about it. I am a worrier and I am not worried about it”.

I agreed saying, “Yes you are. But you are also a good comforter too. And I appreciate it”. Warmly I followed, “and I would like to throw you over top of me right now”.

Mommy smiled back as she grasped my homonymic play on words. ~ sadly she did not take me up on the romance!

But Dylan said, while still looking down at her toy in her lap, “But Daddy you might hurt her if you do dat”.

I’ll take a daughter who fancies ‘care and concern’ over romance any time!

   Happy Holidays!     

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