prostate cancer | OUR LIFE IN 3D

Archive for the tag “prostate cancer”

16 Sep 2014

My Anniversary. Year one…

This Wednesday marks a very special anniversary. It marks the second half of my life. A year ago I had that famous / infamous surgery to remove the prostate cancer from my body. It was life changing in many many ways, as you would imagine.

But first, a word for you, my sponsor:

Thank you for your thoughts and prayers during this time of my life. YOU rock!

I wanted to take you through an exercise where you have to imagine where you have to leave everyone you love behind; as well as all your goals, all the time invested already in the formation of who you are, ending. You think about things like that when the doctor tells you there is cancer in your body.

But I was a lucky one as my cancer was one of the comparatively easy cancers to deal with when caught early. But it still changed my life.

I tried to frame the whole experience in humor. I mean ya gotta laugh, right? Feeling sorry for yourself or trying to blame someone is so hard on the soul. No one wants to be around those types of people. Luckily my prostate experience was packed full if hilarious stories and images!

Like this one, where the morning before the procedure, where they shot 99 radiated seeds in my arse, I had to do number 2 while I was waiting? And so after I debated on the ‘the should ‘I or ‘shouldn’t I’s’ and how it would affect my operation down there. I found my way to a private privy. Did the business. Tried to clean up using only one arm as the other had an IV stuck in it. I tried to save the procedure by trying to sanitize my butt by sticking a glob of germ killing hand sanitizer gel up my crack in an effort to prevent infection? Don’t ever do this! It burns in that little cubby-hole! It really does.

And so, in an effort to wipe the gel out of my butt I had to do a quick quarter turn to get the open back half of my surgical gown out of the way (remember, cause my left hand was holding an IV bag) so my hand with the wash cloth could wipe but as I did my quick quarter turn the gown would jerk back and cover it up and so I kept trying, doing my quarter turn thing, and the gown kept on covering it up and my wife was laughing hysterically as it looked like a dog trying to catch his tail? Do you remember that? You can find that and a few other humorous stories from the day of my procedure here.

Or remember the post of the Saturday morning when I was to go in and donate a ‘sample’ of my prostate to be analyzed (biopsy) only to realize the good doctor meant sample as in plural. I found there were 12 shot glasses in this little torture chamber that Saturday morning each awaiting a different section of my prostate to dissect and analyze to the exact location and extent of the cancer? And not only was he going to stick this intrusive needle in the front of my rear, but also a little light, a camera, a finger, a nurse or two to hold his stethoscope…

YES…Life changing!

And who could forget these images from the inserting-99-radioactive-seeds-in-my-prostate procedure?

Green with radiation!

Stylin’ and Profilin’

It was Plum scarey!

Yea, kinda like that….

Why I found out my little cancer even has its own page of jokes on the Internet! Like this one:

A man elects to have a prostatectomy (removal of the prostate) and asks the surgeon to try to spare and save the nerves that produce an erection. Well, he goes into surgery and wakes up in the recovery room and sees his doctor.
Man: So how did it go?
Doctor: I’ve got good news and bad news.
Man: Give me the good news first.
Doctor: We were able to save the nerves.
Man: That’s great news! What’s the bad news?
Doctor: They’re under your pillow.

There were also a multitude of masturbation jokes that suggest that practice is actually healthy for a prostate. But I won’t touch them here. Although some of them can’t be beat!

So, yes, humor to lighten life’s load. …Oh I hope you think these things are funny. I can’t afford to lose any more readers! 🙂

Now, a year later, I feel better than ever after all this too, although I never ever felt sick to begin with. I may feel a little older, but for an 85 year old man I feel pretty good!

And so occasionally I think about, “Why me?” “Why did I have to go through this?”

Do you ever do that? Try to find reasoning behind the good or bad in your life? Why me? I have no clue. But in trying to find the answer I started reading the Bible; for the first time in my life. It wasn’t to get all religious or born again or anything. That’s not who I am. It was simply an attempt to get to know God a little bit better, and maybe help me figure out ‘why me?’

And also say, “Thank You God!” Cause my outcome could always been a lot worse.

And through this God gave me a new theme song on the day of my cancer analysis, that it was Not My Time, by Three Doors Down, That song serves as a constant reminder of what my life is and what could have been.

‘Cause all this time I’ve just been too blind to understand
What should matter to me
My friend, this life we live, it’s not what we have
It’s what we believe in

And I believe we all have a purpose in this short life of ours. Mine may be to serve, lead and / or spread hope. What is yours? Carpi Diem!

Yes, I also believe the time is now. My friends, don’t wait! You don’t know what lies ahead. Live YOUR life now! You can’t take it with you.

I now believe I should try not to take the normal blessings in our lives for granted. What would you miss the most lying in a hospital? Think about it. Stop and smell the roses. Take a moment right now and fill your lungs full of oxygen…go ahead, I’ll wait. do it just because you can. Someday it may not be so easy.

I believe some friends and family in my life have really stepped up this last year for me and really made a huge difference to me. One or more have changed my life for the better. Thank you!

And, while reading the Bible and trying to get to know God this year was not what I expected it to be, I did discover that God does things; simple things and big things. God is love and He does things. I can’t really say that reading the Bible has made me a better person (as evident by my twisted humor). After all, hypocrisy in some religion is what kept me, and many others, away from it I imagine. But I have become more aware and not so alone. There is always someone I can talk to now I’ve found.

So these are just some of the new discoveries since my eventful September 17 last year. I have tried to document several other things last year via this here blog. I hope you can find some of the things amusing.

Because ya gotta laugh, right? It is the best medicine!

And, I know that every day, me and you, have so much to live for, to be thankful for; more than we can ever imagine or appreciate.

So much to live for. The rest of your life awaits…

So stop reading these blogs and go out and do something already! There is soooo much to live for!

I love you all! Thanks for your time….

“There might be more than you believe
There might be more than you and me
And there might be more than you can see

But it’s not my time, I’m not going
There’s a fear in me, it’s not showing
This could be the end of me
And everything I know.

But I won’t go….”

16 Dec 2013

33 Comments

More good news…

In this season of preparing for the Good News to come, I ran into a bit myself last week.

It was check-up time with Dr. O. and the Oncology team. Dr. O. is the physician that orchestrated my whole green-belly, radiation, Bruce Banner, planting seeds in my flower garden thing.

Well the whole ordeal started with a simple blood test, PSA’s and the reading there of. You want your PSA to be low, near zero I understand. My initial PSA of 6.5 sent me to see Dr. O. and I had a PSA as high as 7.5 before my procedure.

Well last Tuesday the good doctor said my newest PSA registered a 1.5. (Yayyy!) I asked him what his target PSA, or my GOAL. Dr. O. says his job is to get it to a 0.2.

So I asked him his time frame for accomplishing his goal? He said over the next 1-2 years. He followed up that he was very excited with good news to start!

PSA Chart showing how ‘Its Not My Time’

But I tell you he was not the most excited one in the room!

With a little luck I should be around for a long, long time he says. And if I can just get the kinks out I can start working on my immortality; again.

But you see…I have kept this news largely to myself for the last week or so, really just to bubbling over with joy to do anything.

So I wanted to ask you, If YOU got good news, such as this what would you do?

How would you celebrate?

I can’t tell you what I actually did and spoil the survey!

Suffice it to say, I was the last patient of the day, it was late, and I pass right by Dunkin Donuts on the way out of the parking lot.

I’m so boring!

But I can sing Auld Lang Syne a few more times!

OK, you got me.

I could never really sing that song anyway…

Posted in Prostate Cancer ~ Laughter is the Best Medicine and tagged comfort food, Dunkin donuts, prostate cancer, psa

23 Nov 2013

33 Comments

Life’s Ups and Downs…

We have a family ritual that we do at dinner. Mommy thought it up. After we sit down and start to eat she will go around the table and ask each person “What was your BEST thing that happened today?” Its kinda a way to get the kids engaged during dinner as well as have them stick around a little bit longer.

Well on Thursday night when she got to me. I told everyone, “I called the cancer doctor today and he said it is OK for me to start holding you kids again and let them sit on my lap; that the radiation in my belly should have subsided enough to where I am no longer harmful to them.”

Well smiles lit up all around the table.

He also told me I should be OK to start running again. And so we can start rebuilding some of the family dreams that have been put on hold these past few months.

To be clear, this has nothing to do with my body ridding itself of the cancer cells. But a little family bonding should do this ol’ body and spirit some good.

I told the girls it was OK to sit on my lap again for an extended period of time. What my girls actually heard was, “Its OK to jump up and down on daddy’s belly again and maybe get back to a little wrestling.”

That’s OK. I’ve been waiting for this! And so have they! Funny thing, few things in this family bring on such uncontrollable laughter as jumping on and diving at Daddy, with little care or regard about his welfare. See for yourself…

Nothing like having a 45lb girl drop to her knees on your belly! It was OK. The girls really enjoy this and so do I. I may make wrestlers out of them yet. And the boys better beware!

One other fun thing that happened that night was Dylan found her lost key to her Rapunzel book of secrets. She got this book about a year ago from one of her awesome grandmothers.

Its a kinda diary for kids and asks you to write down favorite things and such. It also has several listings of Rapunzel’s favorite things, as well as some fun facts. Flynn Rider has similar listings in the book.

So one thing led to another and we started doing our Rapunzel and Flynn Rider impersonations, based on pictures in the book.

Dylan would stand there and model like the picture of Rapunzel, right down to the hands and expression.

And then I worked on ‘the smoulder’.

“Hey, how ya doin’?”

But every time I did this ‘smouldering impersonation’ Dylan would whack me in the nose! After the second time I stopped her and said “Why did you do that?”

Dylan replies, “Well that’s what Rapunzel does in the movie.” ….she was still playing her part of Rapunzel it appears.

Now, any of you out there that have seen this movie (my personal favorite Disney Princess movie) remember this seen? I kinda remembered the scene. It goes like this….

Now do you think she was yanking my chain or not? This is Dylan we are talking about and the unflappable memory of hers. Do you think she actually remembered it that way or she just enjoyed booping Daddy in the nose, burning out her left over violence from the belly jumping episodes earlier?

Regardless, she genuinely enjoyed my impersonations so much I just kept doing them. She laughed so hard each time.

Mom walked by and Dylan made me do ‘the smoulder’ for her. No, she didn’t whack me in the nose like Dylan had; thank goodness! She didn’t seem to get the thrill out of it like Dylan had each time either.

I dunno. I can do some good impersonations sometimes. What do you think…

OK, I am little embarrassed now that you actually saw that. Please don’t hate. I do a much better ‘Rainman’ and Bogart impersonation.

On the way to school the next morning Dylan asked to see my smoulder a few more times. And that put her in a good mood as she laughed half the way to Kindergarten.

We pulled into the lot to park and as we got Dylan says, “Daddy I think you should do that Flynn Rider thing for my teacher in school!”

I will have no humility left when this girl is done with me!

One final note, I received this video in my Inbox from Youtube this week. I think its a pretty snazzy vid on the whole Movember movement.

Are any of you still participating in this cause by boycotting your razors? Guys? Girls?

Again, think of some of the fun conversations you can have at the Thanksgiving dinner table. Not your usual holiday discussions.

Plus, you are raising some great awareness for the trendy Prostate Cancer! My cancer might have just been ‘stoomped out’ on Thursday!

Thanks to everyone for helping this awareness out!

Oh, and all the Kindergarten teachers loved the impersonation. It went better than I thought it would. 😉

Posted in Archives and tagged Flynn Rider, Hey that mustache tickles!, Movember, prostate cancer, rapunzel

12 Nov 2013

24 Comments

Knock Knock….

Its us again. Remember us here in 3D? We have been distracted with Fall Festivals and Fall Carnivals at school this past week. Plus college football Saturdays, completely removes one day of the week from the calendar. (sigh) Don’t ask.

So I am coming up completely uninspired to write lately. It’s either a dry spell or ‘Life’ just isn’t popping with as many great or funny stories to rehash. (sigh again). I got nothing for ya but wanted to let you know we are all still alive here. What should I do? Pictures of dinner? Reblog? Don’t worry…they are coming….

Do you know what I mean when I say a ‘ Highway Pee”? A Highway Pee might be when you have to go to the bathroom while you are driving but there is not another exit or rest stop on the highway for another 15 miles to go.

This has been my way of life the last few weeks… a small inconvenience for prostate cancer. And while the feeling of urgency is graphic, the ending result is usually a minimal or disappointing load. This bladder illusion over the past 2 months has taught me that if I just whack myself in the jewels a time or two the urgency alarm subsides. Kids, don’t try this at home! Again, a small inconvenience for having and treating the C-word.

Plus, I can still get lucky, when circumstances permit. And I am not very lucky guy! I wish I was luckier. Many prostate cancer patients can’t experience that kind of luck with their spouse anymore; which, of course, affects more than one party. So that makes me doubly lucky it seems like.

So, if a highway pee several times day and getting a self-imposed sock in the groin occasionally is a small inconvenience for me, why not put down YOUR razors this month?

Ladies? Howabout you? I was really ~~expected to see~~ hoping to see some ‘furry or prickly’ legs by now. Think about the great conversations you might have over Thanksgiving dinner on your selfless, charitable act! Happy Movember! Enough said.

My mustache is filling in nicely and starting to gather crumbs. My little 3 year old calls me a “Hairy Monster” now. She says, “Daddy is that hair growing?”

And oh, how I can embarrass my wife in church! ….sneaking a powdered donut in the kid’s Sunday School beforehand ~ yes I can’t get away with anything! Busted! Did I mention I wasn’t too lucky?

But I am starting to look famous!

With all due respect to Wolowitz and the Big Bang,

I call this ‘the Connery ‘….

How many of you are thinking about the big meal for Thanksgiving yet? And the hosting of families or the traveling to? We talked with my parents Sunday night about who was doing what for the big meal. They have always come to visit us in the comfortable climates of the South for T-Day.

Of course, while they try to mask their intentions with the Sunday call, with questions about our week, jobs, and health, they really just want to talk with our girls.

So I put each granddaughter on so they can start warming up ‘Santa’ with their Christmas wishes.

It was cute. Our youngest just likes to go on and on and on on the telephone. Finally she got to her Christmas wish. …a Stuffie.

Of course that is the same item Dylan is wanting as well. So when it was time for Dylan’s Christmas list it came back to the Stuffie. Her grandmother said she never heard of it. So Dylan proceeded to tell her how she can order it over the Internet, being an old hack at that already. My parents would never understand this, or even trust doing a tranaction over the Internet. So I hope Aunt Sue can help the girls out.

You know, I frequently paint out some of the kid’s amazing exploits here in 3D but 99% of the time they are just typical kids. They wrestle for Mom’s cell phone. Love to color and swing outside. Dylan had her best friend from Kindergarten over this past weekend and their other best friend, their next door neighbor, frequently accompanies us out to lunch on the weekends. They don’t want to go to bed. They get up WAYYYYY too early and always want a story, hug, and a kiss good night. They are both good kids and we are blessed.

Plus it is less than 5 days until the radiation in my belly dissipates low enough for me to hold the girls on my lap again. Then they can wrestle with Dad instead of for Mom’s cell phone. And Dylan is counting the days….

The other big news is that I had my biggest day of views in almost ever on Sunday. I received a Notification on Sunday that my blog was getting HOT!

Your blog, OUR LIFE IN 3D, appears to be getting more traffic than usual!

88 hourly views

1 hourly views on average

The hour before that I had 49 hits. It turns out the great country of Japan, or someone in it, viewed this blog 130 times in one hour. What are your thoughts on this?

Of those 130 ‘clicks’ 27 of them came from a post on Ocean City, NJ. Another 20+ clicks came on photos of my kids. Oh, how I hope this was some long lost friend of the family that was just bored in Japan on Sunday….but I can’t think of who that would be. If you see this, Mr. or Mrs. ‘Japan’ and you know me, please say’ Hello’ by way of a comment. I would love to catch up! Otherwise I am having WordPress look into it. …cause they saw it first.

And that’s about it right now from our little part of the coast. I wish it was more. No happy feet. No new technolgy acheivements. Just us. Or, like my oldest would say, “I’m just Dylan”.

Thanks for dropping by! I’ll try to do better next time….

Posted in Archives and tagged Fall Festivals, Japan, Movember, Plus college football Saturdays, prostate cancer

01 Oct 2013

29 Comments

Post Prostate Procedure Update

I wanted to give a brief update on my treatment and recovery in dealing with my prostate cancer. Possibly, if anyone finds they have prostate cancer and has the Brachytherapy (Radiation Seed Implant) as an option this can serve as a example to my experience in treating the cancer and hopefully may answer a few questions.

If anyone reading this knows of someone with prostate cancer, and most certainly you will sometime, let this be a guide. But the only way to have my treatment method, Brachytherapy and radiation seed implants, is to get the cancer detected early. To have this option the cancer must still be relatively small and localized; no spreading. Otherwise more invasive treatments must be used, up to and including removal.

My first week has been pretty easy. The short story here is I went back to work the Friday after my procedure; back to work in 3-4 days. Anyone reading this that has this option, I highly recommend you take it. Now 2 weeks since the procedure I feel normal. I feel great; just like how I felt when I walked in the hospital. Infact, I felt that way a week ago.

The day of my procedure was a breeze. They gave me an IV early. I danced in my surgical gown after a bathroom adventure. Two hours later they wheeled me to the operating room. I switched beds by own accord. A nurse with pretty white teeth said, ‘I am now going to drop something in your IV that will make me sleep’ and the next thing I know I am waking up in the recovery room, mentally searching my body to see what hurts. Nothing hurt. It was that easy. I entered the hospital at 5.30am and was discharged by 2.00pm. … for a cancer treatment.

I went back to my Oncologist the next morning at 8.30am and his nurse took out the catheter. This went waaaayyyyy easier than I thought it would be; out in a second. It felt like I was peeing really hard; that’s what the catheter felt like being removed.

Sure there are some anxious moments, mainly stemming from things I didn’t understand; mainly that morning in the hospital, living with a catheter in and especially the catheter removal. I didn’t get much sleep the night with the catheter in. And Pee’ing has been the biggest concern. It really took me half the morning the day of my procedure to pee at all on my own and then I could not get a stream until about 3pm that day.

My butt was sore initially but not where I thought it would be. While I thought the area of injections would be in the land down under, where my legs come together, the actual busy area was BEHIND that area, not so much in the middle, but literally in the REAR.

Note: Urinary tract through one’s prostate and the shortest distance to insert radioactive needles is via the rectum

I came home with a maxi pad type cushion in my catheter underwear for my butt and there were a few blood dots on it from the needles. The inner portions of my cheeks were swollen for about a week. It seems most of the needles entered my prostate via my lower rectum. That area is still a bit sore. And why wouldn’t it be sore? I figure 30+ needles went in through there.

I have what looks like a months’ worth of infection medicine. Thankfully, I do not have any infections though. I do have some meds for pain, percocets.

Now I had not taken the pain meds because I didn’t feel like I needed them after the catheter was removed. I felt fine! However I read online a few days following my release that the pain meds were for the swelling. I didn’t know! It’s a good thing I looked up ‘recovery’ on a web search.

My stomach felt ‘full‘ the first few days although I could eat. And I think that had to do with overall swelling inside my stomach. They said my prostate should have really swollen up. I thought to get 95 seeds in my tiny, poor ol’ prostate it would have had to be enlarged!

And I don’t feel the seeds or radiation one bit. None! I would never know they were there. Although I swear I can smell the radiation. My wife says that’s not likely. I have had that same ‘hospital smell’ around me for almost 10 days.

I have many of the usual ‘side effects’ that pertains to this procedure and my urine. My urine stream has been impaired. Impaired? My 3 year old has more fluid volume than I do.

The gentle flow usually means smaller urination, creating more frequency, given a normal diet.

I get the urges to go real bad but when I make it to the bathroom I barely get a stream. This is normal I hear. Guess the prostate is still rather enlarged. Size does matter! I worry what’s wrong while I wait to finish but when I am done it feels good. It’s hard to explain.

The day following the procedure it was real important that I go to make sure my urinary tract was not injured during the procedure. Well, I went, eventually, just 15 minutes before my deadline, but only enough to fill a shot glass.

I was told to take a warm bath for the swelling that may have occurred from my catheter placement but that “if I couldn’t get a stream going by 3:00pm to come back in.

Uh-oh!

So I drank some more and waited and waited.

I finally found the old, ‘hands up against the wall’ pose as the most comfortable as I waited for some action down there.

But, now, I go to the bathroom more often than I used to. My streams are weak or smallish. And I frequently have the sensation of wondering whether I am actually finished or still more to come, forcing me to adopt a new pee’ing position

An extreme example of this came last Sunday as I counted 6 times that I got up to go to the bathroom between 10:30pm and 12:30am. That’s one every 20 minutes. I ended up getting up over 10 times that very sleepless night.

But all these issues are listed side effects. I see it as all fixing itself in time.

And while one side effect maybe blood in the urine, I have none of that. However, the 2nd or third day, while I was in the shower, I was cleaning up and noticed my penis was mostly purple, along with a great portion of my scrotum. Yes black and blue.

Ahhhh!

Yea, kinda like that….

Frankly, you really hate to see black and blue or ‘injury’ in your sensitive areas and this was no exception. Thoughts of ‘withering and falling off’ run through your mind.

It was Plum scarey!

This was really unsettling at the time but I figured it was from all the trauma it must have went through with the catheter initially. And the discoloration is starting to fade now. Thankfully, nothing has fallen off!

In fact, here now at 14 days since my procedure, my doctor told me I am supposed to exercise that wiener!

He told me that intercourse would be good ‘therapy’ for the healing and rejuvenation of my prostate. The catch is that I need to wear a condom in case one of my glowing seeds passes through my prostate.

Now how many surgeries can you think of that tell you to go have sex as a way to heal? So, in a way, we actually will be playing doctor this week!

Another side effect might be my energy being sapped. I fag-out around 3pm-4pm the majority of the days since the procedure. At first I thought it was from the pain killers. But then I stopped taking them during the day. But I still feel nappy.

I left work 30- 60 minutes early each day of my return. Possibly it is the radiation inside me making me tired or my body dealing with some changes

I tried to ride my bike this past weekend but that didn’t seem like a good idea. Yes, my rear is still a bit sore inside.

In looking back, over the whole treatment for my prostate cancer, the hardest part of this whole procedure was done at the testing, the biopsy. And that wasn’t so bad. Again, not too bad for having a cancer.

Of course I am gun-hoe now since it is over but I have to remind myself I still have the cancer and it won’t be for another 2 months or so until I know if this procedure actually got rid of my cancer. So I tell myself it’s not over yet. But so far no complications.

You know if I am running down the aisles of a grocery store, pushing two girls in a grocery cart, I can’t be feeling too bad. In fact…

I feel too good!

I feel pre-procedure, when I didn’t feel sick at all. I feel unleashed, like a new lease on life. I feel like I don’t have a small box of radiated BB’s in my belly.

I wish I would! Then I would remember to not pick up my two girls and carrying on with them. It’s hard to remember about the radiation without a ~~good~~ mild reminder.

So, in summary, the procedure went well. Recovery is fairly easy and pretty quick. And ‘best practices’ for healing and recovery include having sex and sleeping. Maybe I can just drag this recovery out a little bit longer then!

Thanks again to all of you that sent the prayers, well-wishes and healing thoughts. it really meant a lot! Words can’t express my gratitiude but….

YOU rock!