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Top 10 Signs That Mom Needs a Vacation

“My novel, Drawing Free, deals with a tough subject, but one that I feel needs to be addressed because sometimes moms have bad days when they just want to run away from it all. Whether you admit it or not…if you’re a mom, I’m willing to bet you’ve had one of those days.

Since Drawing Free looks at the tougher side of when a mom has had enough, I wanted to take a lighter look. I ran a contest to come up with the Top 10 Signs That Mom Needs a Vacation, and this is what members of the Goodreads‘ group, Ladies & Literature, came up with.



Their answers made me snort tea, with only a little bit hitting my laptop. When I was done wiping up the mess, I compiled the final list.”

Top 10 Signs That Mom Needs a Vacation 

  1. When you realize the spit up in your hair holds better than hairspray.
  2. When you yell four names before getting the right one and one of them is your husband’s.
  3. When you view the restroom as your ‘happy place’ because of the solitude.
  4. When you open your purse and find that it contains 15 receipts for kids clothing and shoes, a half-eaten lollipop that has been rewrapped, tutti-fruiti rainbow flavored chapstick, a nursing pad, three Hotwheels, a pair of size 2T panties and absolutely no cash.
  5. When the only songs you know are sung by cartoon characters or men who wear primary colours with Australian accents.
  6. When your husband comes home from work, sees the house is in relatively good order and says, “Oh, today was good?”
  7. When you’re more excited about your daughter’s weekend sleep-over at a friend’s house than your daughter.
  8. When your children bring you breakfast in bed and all you can think about is if there is enough dishwashing soap to clean the mess they left in the kitchen.
  9. When you start to think SpongeBob is actually funny.
  10. When you have no idea whose snot is on your shirt. And don’t care.

Which answer is your favourite?
What other signs are there that mom needs a vacation?

~ Thanks Leeanne & Elena! We were taking the time to look for vacation spots and quite coincidentally Leeanne, from Ironic Mom, and her friend Elena Aitken show me how much we need to create some urgency here! Check out more of  their funny stuff at the Ironic Mom.

Leave The Dirt To Me…

Before I became a dad I had never changed a diaper before. People always talked about how horrible it was. I heard all the ‘urban legends’ and detailed stories. So, when I was finally pushed into my moment of truth I opened up the tabs and was utterly disappointed. Being a restaurant manager in the past I had cleaned up far worse messes than this. I said, “Is that all you got”?

I had nooo idea how resourceful these girls can be!

Which brings me back to Cleaning Tip # 1 MUST HAVE’s two and three.

The second MUST HAVE for a DDD  is a hand-held Black and Decker cordless Flex portable vacuum.  When the kids look like they left more lunch on the floor than in their bellies, whip out this Flex! When doing crafts turns into a glitter disaster, its Flex time! When the kids have a food fight with a large bag of  Goldfish, while you’re in the shower, the portable Flex can actually save lives! Don’t lug out the portable vac in the closet. Flex instead.

Finally, the Roomba! This is the robot vacuum cleaner that works by itself. I confess it is not the best vacuum cleaner I have used BUT  it can vacuum while you sleep. Cool! I can vacuum and be at the park at the same time. It can clean the kid’s room while we all play outside. Simply this gadget saves you time when time is one thing you don’t have enough of.

They actually make Roombas for carpets, hard wood floors and even swimming pools. My Christmas Wish is they come up with one that does the LEAVES outside. My Festivis Miracle!

So I know what you are thinking, “How many vacuum cleaners does DDD really need”?

We actually collected five (!)  by now. I told my wife I would not tease her anymore about the need to have five vacuum cleaners. So I will stop here. Please don’t tell her I brought it up…again .

On a side note, we actually named our Roomba “Rosie”. When we came home one day Dylan asked who cleaned the living room. Mommy said, “errrr Rosie the Roomba.

And remember, if you like what you heard…spread the word… Our Life In 3D. Thanks!

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